Shoemaker Levy Nine (The Pain of a Beautiful Reminder)
Just let me do some emo just this once.
Nothing depresses me more than a reminder of the past. On the one hand, it’s a good way to gauge how far you have moved on. On the other hand, it takes only one reminder to bring tears to your eyes, and catapult you back to a time that you thought you already have forgotten.
It’s like a comet shooting across the sky. All you leave behind eventually follow you. No matter how fast you move, no matter how far away you stray, and no matter where you go, there’s always something you leave behind that moves with you.
You know what they say: the more things change, the more they stay the same. It gets kind of difficult and tiring to convince yourself every day that everything’s over, when in fact nothing ever is. One way or another, paths will cross, and there really isn’t anything you can do about that. I don’t know what it is: chance, destiny, dumb luck… I don’t really know.
Comets, like people, eventually move out of orbit. They become so close to you, and yet still so far. The path may seem so regular, that you’ll never get to hear it or even see it. I guess the reason why we celebrate the path of a comet so much is because we’re close to it, no matter how far it is. But the same is not true for people; there are some people we do not want to be reminded of, or even cross paths with. Even the remotest idea of having to one day walk on the same sidewalk as that person will send an unexplainable chill to your very spine.
I don’t know what it is. I don’t know what feeling is there when you get to be reminded of that someone again. I suppose that’s what happens when you didn’t close the chapter the way you wanted it to, when you never really had the chance to mend ways and part ways the way it was meant to be.
I never saw the significance of it all; but now I know that we were more than what we always thought we were, and we were more than what we thought we were meant to be.