In 2008, I'm Gonna Get Myself A Girlfriend

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   Here comes the pain. 

   I’m only doing this because I suck at making New Year’s Resolutions.  Maybe if I made a New Year’s Resolution public, the responsibility of sticking to it becomes even greater.

   Today is January 1, 2008: I am giving myself exactly 364 days to get a girlfriend.

   I got to thinking that maybe it’s high time I got myself involved again in the ways of love.  After three years of singlehood and living two years of my life in varying degrees of heartache, I think I’m prepared to tackle the joys and responsibilities of being committed to someone I love.

   Maybe I am being hasty, but let’s face it: I’m 22 freaking years old and my last serious relationship lasted three freaking months.  Maybe I wasn’t prepared to handle emotional rollercoasters at 19 going on 20, but after a few years of finding my center, I think I’m prepared to handle a relationship no matter how much it gets fucked up.

   Of course, there are a few hurdles to getting a girlfriend in 364 days: for all I know, I may be gay.  For two, if in 364 days I would finally get to have sex, I would realize that it really isn’t instinctive (I may get my John Thomas in the wrong hole that’s not found in the immediate location of the female pelvis).  For three, a 364-day deadline won’t work, and I’ll be back here again, making yet another New Year’s Romantic Resolution in 2009.

   I’m not pressuring myself, but something tells me I will need romantic companionship this year.

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